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Since becoming elderly, my wife and I have become world travelers.

Recently, we ‘slow’ hopped (over seven weeks!) from Puerto Rico to New York to London, then Paris and back to New York.

So many places! And all so diverse!

In the London subway (‘underground’ or ‘tube”), you will find people begging for money just like in New York. But in London they do it in a lovely British accent!

In Puerto Rico, you cannot pay at the pump. Anywhere. A real pain.

In London, cars drive on the left. So I cannot cross the street, because even though I know from which direction the cars are gonna come run me down, I’m helpless because my head always seems to turn the other way first!

In Puerto Rico, the only bread you can buy is a long, soft bread. That’s it! No rolls. No rye. And their ‘bakeries’ keep their one type of bread in the back room. I do not know why.

At dinner in Paris, you are presented with a basket of small rolls; no butter. No oil. Just delicious, fresh French rolls. So good.

There is an embarrassing language barrier for me everywhere. In Puerto Rico, I dare not attempt my limited Spanish.

In London, my American accent gives me away, so I am just…tolerated.

Paris? My high school French is greeted with rolled eyes.

But it’s even worse for me in the United States, and even upstate New York, when I start to speak in my Brooklyn English…

Lots of money is required to visit London and Paris and New York; Puerto Rico, not so much. People there work hard and are down to earth. I like it.

It’s also where my wonderful wife is from, which makes me like it even more!

In France there reportedly is a huge issue with people who like to pick your pocket. That did not concern me, though, because growing up in Brooklyn, my issue was with people who liked to hit you over the head first, then pick your pocket…

It is very hot in Puerto Rico, but the stores and restaurants are nicely air conditioned (when there isn’t a power outage!). It feels even hotter in Paris, where most stores and restaurants are not air conditioned!

London was partly cloudy for our entire week, with no rain, and jacket-wearing temperatures. Perfect!

In London and France, bicycles share the bus lanes, and sometimes actually stop at red lights. In New York, they gleefully curse at you and run you down. In PR they ride in large groups.

When I say good morning to strangers in Brooklyn, I normally get a response. A ‘good day’ in London is generally not reciprocated. In PR you need to say ‘Buenos Dias’ for a response. ‘Bonjour’ is what to say in Paris, but people just look at you warily.

Subway are much smaller in London and Paris than NY, and aren’t air conditioned. But they are cleaner, and arrive very quickly. And people there are quick to give up their seat for an older woman.

Bathrooms in London restaurants are generally beautiful. In Puerto Rico they are hit or miss, and NEVER offer hot water.

London: beans with breakfast!

Puerto Rico: rice. Rice. And more rice!

France: lots of duck. Donald, Daffy and sometimes even Daisy.

Restaurants in Paris offer delicious cuisine to be consumed in stifling heat. Prices for food in Puerto Rico are cheap in restaurants, high in supermarkets.

One magical aspect of flying home to JFK from Paris: our nine hour flight left at noon, and arrived at…3PM! We actually arrived in the past!

As far as the French being dismissive of Americans, it is with extreme assuredness that I report that that it is a crock.

Aside from our hotel’s dismissive and condescending hotel management (not staff), every person we encountered on the streets of Paris went out of their way to be courteous and thoughtful and polite. Très bien! And mèrci beaucoup!

I like every place I have been. But I like Brooklyn the best, because there’s no place like home…